Skip to main content

Barely Holding On

Image result for stressed
It's safe to say I don't know what I'm doing. Well maybe I do know, but I'm overwhelmed. I can't seem to find the time to get it all done. I thought I was ahead of the game when I submitted my work to my agent ( I am very aware of every time I say this. I feel like I sound self- important. However, I do have an agent.) Anyway, I sent my work to my agent and I thought, "Whew, glad that's off my plate."


via GIPHY
Now, didn't think that I was done with my revisions. However, I also didn't think he'd read and respond and critique my new work within a week. He gave me more notes and now I have to go back through my manuscript from the beginning and read it like a reader and a copy editor simultaneously. The problem is where do I get more hours in a day. I haven't had a moment to breathe, let alone think about all that I have to do. My youngest daughter was sick that threw me off my game. Add that to their grueling cheer schedule of practice 6 days a week. (I cannot wait for December. Once the National competition is over we are taking a break.)

Then there's work. Teaching 12th grade and 9th grade is hell. I can't tell you the last time I've done thoughtful lesson plans. I do my plans but it's when I get to work, right before class starts. Don't tell my principal. I want to use my time at work to work on my MA thesis like a normal teacher but I haven't been afforded that chance because I'm actually doing work at work.

So yea, to say I'm swamped and overworked is an understatement. Truthfully I need a day to sleep. I'm totally running on E and every single morning I turn my alarm clock off at 5a.m., give myself fifty minutes of ten more minutes until I roll out of bed at 6. Which, wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have to drag two little girls out of bed who move like snails maybe even slower because they don't want to go to school. This causes me to start my day behind the eight-ball. And I've been barely making it to work on time. Today I totally didn't make it on time as I was thirty minutes late. I've got to do better.

Needless to say, I have all of my ideas in my head. I even know what I want to do for my E-lit class to make it relate to my MA thesis. My goal is to do a piece that shows the worlds of Newark and Millburn from Mya's (my main character) perspective. I did begin what I think is a first draft of what I hope will turn into my afterword or author's note at the end of Misunderstood. I was inspired enough by Toni Morrison to know that I will not be the next Toni Morrison, Maya Angelou or Alice Walker for that matter and that's okay. A lot of my hesitation and reluctance to write has been because I've tried to be them or write like them and have a story just as important to tell. I can only tell my stories as only they could tell theirs but it is nice to peek in and get inspired. Right about now I can use a little bit of motivation and inspiration.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Now the Real Work Begins

Photo: Twitter @Jarredamato These books are my inspiration.  Now, I have to admit that I haven't read all of them. In fact, I've only read two of them and yet, I have all of them in my collection. Sitting on top of my bookshelf staring at me, patiently waiting to be cracked open and read. The reason I haven't read these books is well, totally work related. Yea, I blame it all on my job. It sounds really lame, but it is true. I want nothing more than to read and occasionally binge watch This is Us . But well, the way my life and responsibilities are set up... that is just not in the cards. Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself.  Like I said, these books are my inspiration. Last week we had the pleasure to video chat with Barbara Ganley  @bgblogging. Alan was there too, but Barbara's feedback and input was amazing.  I couldn't write down my notes fast enough. She said so many "quotable" things that I just couldn't keep up. Barbara...
2 comments
Read more

Onward

Maybe the hardest part of this process is behind me. Maybe. Or it could be that I'm just over this one very big hurdle. Either way. I'm one step closer to the finish line. And it just so happens that I have two different end goal. The first one is to finish out this semester and earn my Masters degree. The second is to sell my book to a publishing company. It would be really cool if by graduation in May my novel, Misunderstood has already been sold to a publishing company and the announcement has been made in the Rights Report (a place where publishing companies announce newly acquired book deals weekly.) Talk about a full circle moment. I'm going to put it all the way out there in the universe my making this declaration. By the time I walk across the stage in May to earn my diploma, I will have sold my book-- which was started during my time as a graduate student. Okay, so this week was pretty stressful but I made it though. After reading through 328 double-spaced page...
Post a Comment
Read more